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Profile picture of user: a_p_wyndham

This is a really wonderful concept! Largely well-done, too. Although I did stumble in a couple of places when reading it. I only bring that up because, even though it's great, I think it could be stronger. If you're interested, I'd be happy to share my thoughts. But if the poem is living on its own now and you're happy with what it's doing, there's no need to change anything.

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Profile picture of user: s_zaynab_kamoonpury

Thanks muchly for the comment and critique. Yeah im not very good at editing. Like i wouldn't know if there is anything wrong with my poem.